my dogs eat farts

OK so last night we had a pre screening of our movie..OF CAMPUS, a movie.  I can't tell face or the boys but it is no where near done.  If I tell them it needs more TLC I will never see the face and I will never have my wedding.  Oh god, and on a side note... they said I was getting edited out.  I was not edited out!!! my fat face is in like 5 scenes!!!  It would be one thing if I felt pretty or skinny, but NO - I was on the rag and they put waaaayy to much makeup on me.  I look like a rotund overly rouched blonde slut.  the slut part technically wasn't an insult since all women are portrayed as sluts except for the Crystal character.  The little sister of a main character adn a love interest.  But I can tell you right now some stuff is hilarious.  I mean I was there when they filmed, I watched the dailies, I dumped the film, listened for breaks in audio and I still think certain scenes are hilarious.  Maybe I think they are hilarious because I know the people but I dont laugh out loud very often.  I hope things work out.  I really dont want to giv eup my lovey face for another month or two.  after wedding YES OKAY I UNDERSTAND (all will flow from my lips - AFTER WEDDING)...right now NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

twitter

I have seriously become obsessed with twitter.  I spend most of my days now checking twitter and favrd.  I am afraid I will get blocked because I add like 5 awesome more people a day.  But of course no one follows me because I am LAME.  I wish face would do it also - then we could send love messages all day and people would know I was loved....booo

chuck norris's tears cure cancer

so today i had a mini melt down.  matty face and i spent our weekend running around.  family fun on saturday but sunday was work.  work in the sense that we had to house hunt.  back tracking a bit to explain why we are house hunting.  we decided we should buy a house since the market is the way that it is.  a house that is all ours, a place that i can paint the walls the way i want to.  then we were planning to rent this house out and move to a nicer bigger place.  so i found us a house.  let me elaborate -  i randomnly found one.  we went to visit it and fell in love.  i loved the kitchen and the back yard.  matty face started dreaming up little renovations - a roof top patio!! then we got the home inspection, the place was falling apart.  i mean falling apart - at the seams.  so we bailed.  now we feel like we need to find a place - like we feel obligated.  i told matty face if we don't find a place by jan 1 i am taking the money and putting it towards the wedding fund.  so now we have a realtor who is taking us to houses that we can't afford or houses we would never in a million years want to rent out.  so i am a little frustrated. 

but then i pause and think, are we doing the right thing.  buying a house.  i never thought i would buy a house.  i almost did 3 years ago.  and i freaked at the last minute.  i can't move around like a nomad like i want.  my plan before me and the face got back together was to pay off my bills and then travel.  join a band as a photographer and just roam the world.  matty face doesnt really like that idea and i think he thinks i'll grow out of it.  maybe i will, but right now i hate being stuck in one place for too long. 

should we buy a house.  should we move back home.  if we do either will i be giving up my freedom.  so many questions and no one to really give me the right answers. 

eeew gross

so i feel as though i tried to eat a wall.  they are doing contruction in my office and i seriously feel like i may have tried to eat the dry wall.  yesterday was horrible.  there was dust everywhere, it looked as though we were on fire and the smoke was coming up the stairs.  but in reality.  it was clouds of dust that made its way past the tarp.  i sneezed at one point yesterday and hacked up this huge lugie.  it was gross, so nasty.  now everytime i swallow i feel as though my head will cave in and my throat gives a little nnnnooooo.  i went to bed last night and woke suddenly like i need WATER.  i drank a glass greedily and fell back asleep only to wake as though someone slipped me a roofie.  i want to go back to bed...but i can't.

thursdays at work are fun.  everyone else is so busy i can pretend to do work.  sometimes i feel like peter from office space.  I do about an hour of real work a day.  well that is not entirely true.  i really only do work from about 10  to 12.  ok so two hours of work.  but thrusdays are great because wednesdays are so busy.  wednesdays are check day - i love wednesdays.  i love the rush of being busy and having something to do.

it is not that i hate my job or even what i my job entails.  i think i enjoy certain aspects of my job.  i love numbers and learnign the solution to a problem.  what i hate is having to deal with everyone else.  no one every wants to admit they are wrong.  no one wants that extra surcharge on their order because it cuts into their commision.  i want to shake these people and be like - i dont make commision, and i do all your grunt work.  so i basically have devised a new plan, you dont help me i dont help you.  i can barely pay my bills.  poor matty face last night had to borrow my credit card just to buy gas and ciggies.  now i fear i wont have enough room on my charge card to pay for my LONG ado hair appointment.  so why should i give a fuck and fret about people who have a ton of money.  i say FIRE ME if you think i am nto doign a good job, FIRE ME if i defy your rules.  i am pretty sure i can easily get another job in less than a month or go on unemployment with the chance to look for the perfect grad program.

i gotta go everyone is in my cube and talking about the Phillies....

OCTOBER 13th, 13 years* anniversary matty face!!

* thirteen is a realtive term referring to the time it has been since we origionally started dating not the number of years we have actually been together

so that is how matty face and i started our day out today.  shouting out to the world it is 13 whole freaking years since he asked me to be his little lady - we were only 15.  who knew 13 years later i would be come his wifey.  well matty face says he knew since day one, but i sure as hell had no idea.  we had our stops and starts.  9 years of being broken up just to find each other again.

so tonight we go to a flyers game and sit suuupppeer close.  i won tickets at work.  when they sent over the email asking if we wanted to put our names in - i was like yes!!!  then i couldn't believe it when someone else won!  i was like huh, i thought fate was on my side.  but then the person who won actually handed them over to me and said have a great anniversary.  i mean how much better is that a way to win, than to actually win.  i mean of course i feel guilty for taking the tickets, but there is no way matty face and i would have been able to afford something to do tonight.

also just think in 5 months i will be mrs matty face.  ahhhhh!!!  i mean most people already call me mrs matty face, but it will be official.  sometimes it is hard for me to be someone's girl.  to lose myself in the ownership of it all.  i like being little lonely star.  but hey soon enough 2 will make 3, or rather 4 will make 5 (can't forget my puppy babies).

everything will work out perfect. 

boo boos and band aids

Friday, yay! Busy weekend ahead for me. TWL is coming for a visit and the matty face is excited. Unfortunately I think it is a bad weekend. Matty face and I celebrating our 13 years since he asked me out anniversary on Monday and I wanted a nice weekend to be all silly. He has been working the past 4 weekends and overtime at work so I feel as though I never see him. So I guess am a little frumpy. But a happy frump cause I love when TWL comes for a visit. TWL is one of matty faces oldest friends. And sometimes I think he is more excited about our impending nuptials than we are. The kid even has pics of our dogs on his myspace page. But then who I am I to say anything I have a pic of my friend’s kid on mine. Matty face and I got her a little onesie with an angry bunny and she rocked it like a superstar.

Anyway, so we are going to the “Terror Behind the Walls” http://www.easternstate.org/halloween/ and I am super excited. I wanted to go last year but we never got around to it. Another fun Halloween thing I want to do some day is go to a corn maze. It is a maze built from corn. I mean awesomeness. But back to the haunted penitentiary. One thing you need to know about me is I love scary movies and I have a great imagination. But I am scared to death of the dark. I freak out if matty face turns the lights out on me. I’m okay in the bedroom when it is time for bed simply because there is a street lamp right near our window, but the hallway/stairwell – heeeeelllllllll no.

Oh my, I just remember. You will never believe what happened to my little angel face last night. We had taken the pups to the groomer to get a bath and toenail clipping so that when TWL came they wouldn’t be all smelly and have Freddy Krueger toes. This was like days ago, but they refused to cut Toulouse’s nails. He apparently took off his muzzle and tried to bite the girl. Poor baby doesn’t like to be manhandled. There is a protocol with him that most people don’t realize. Let him sniff your hand, give him a treat, then rub his ears. Sometimes I even have to do it and he LOVES me. They told us to take him to the vet! I hate cutting his nails; he gets all squirmy and scratches me. So matty face likes to try to and do it when they aren’t paying attention. This normally works really well, but it takes forever. So last night he clipped one nail and got a little ambitious and went for another one, but he clipped it too close and he cut into marrow. Poor baby starts bleeding everywhere. He runs off and starts licking his toes. I think he is okay but then I see a pool of blood forming near where he is standing. So I go crazy looking for the liquid band aid stuff and can’t find it. Mind you matty face is sitting there watching tv nonplussed. So I get a bowl of water and try to soak the little paw. I get it damp and than is it. He runs from me. I then scream at matty face to go to the store and get me liquid band aid. He grudgingly gets off the couch and heads to the store. He comes back with a spray which is ten times easier than the other kind. We spray the little paw and he runs off again. Five minutes later he is sitting next to me all exhausted. Now matty face looks at him and says why won’t he love me. I say take him and poor matty face is like he doesn’t want me around him now. He tries to pet the little angel but he runs back to me. I feel so helpless and just reassure matty face that he is okay he is just a little sore and where I was sitting was more comfy. But baby face is still hurting you could tell this morning he didn’t want to eat breakfast or go anywhere other than my lap. I am sure he will be fine by dinner tonight, he loves TWL. Hopefully that will cheer the little monster up.

work v play

do you ever feel like work gets in the way of your fun? all my life i wanted to be an artist. at first i had no idea what kind of artist, i didn't know what i was good at. years later i attend college planning to become a painter. reality sets in, i suck at painting. i then proceed to take a photography class - it was like someone hit me over the head and was saying shoot! photo became my world. my closest friend at school had been taking photography since high school and we shot different things, but i always felt a sense of competition with her. she was super good in her own right, but she rarely ventured outside of her comfort zone. me i couldn't get enough of new exciting things. when our teacher brought around vintage cameras and medium formats i swear i had my first orgasm right there in class. i spent four years of college experimenting in the dark room and became known as the weird artsy photography girl. in a relatively large art school that is seriously an honor.

but then life came on fast. i got a job in a bookstore thinking i still had time to try and find a photography assistant job. then life came on even faster and i realized i had to pay bills. student loan payments started up, car insurance and my god i wanted to move out my parents house after 3 weeks of being back home! so i went the way of any common slave to bills i got an office job. five years later i still work in an office - i do accounts payable. for those of you who have no idea what accounts payable is - i pay bills. any corporation or company has a person who receives invoices for payment and quite simply, pays them.

i wish i had more time to be that artsy kid again. photography has moved to a digital age and i missed out. i went to college before they were even thinking about offering those kinds of classes. i remember senior year being so upset because i had to take certain requirement classes and not having room in my schedule for a digital photo class. it was the first ever one they had offered. now i try to teach myself things here and there and stay updated. but i still have to work a full time slave driver job. i dream about the day when i get to shoot all day and edit all night. hmm, one can dream i guess.

GOOGLE PHONE!!!!!!!

ok so being a t-mobile member is not fun, especially when you are a hard core lover of anything apple. yes, I am one of those uber nerds who when they get a mass email from apple they immediately call their favourite loved one, aka matty face, and rant/discuss for about an hour. when my computer from college finally died matty face took me to buy a powerbook. he taught me how to ichat so that if i was every in another room from him we could still see each other. i know, i know - but hey it is sweet in a geeky kinda way. (seriously tho, if you looked at us you would have no idea uber nerds lives inside our little blonde heads.)

anyway, but today i love t-mobile. t-mobile is getting the new g1 google phone. AHHHHHH!!!! i love google, love google, probably as much as i love apple. if apple and google merged my life would be complete.

matty face comes home yesterday and starts bitching about his phone. then he nonchalantly says he is getting a new phone. my eyes immediately dart to his face and i pull a face. he knows better than to tell me he is spending money on anything other than wedding supplies. then in a feeble attempt to save his ass he blurts you are getting one too. me really why and that is gonna be our christmas gifts - no christmas for you. he then proceeds to tell me all about the google phone. and then i look it up online and i get to see it in all its glory. seriously go to youtube and there are a ton of videos.

hmmm, i still really want an iphone. but i think the google phone will soooo make up for that at half the price and plan availability. yayayayay

hey did i spell that right

Ok - so i usually despise mondays, but my monday has flowed into my tuesday. I woke up for work at 8 am had to feed the dogs and be dressed and out of the house by 8.20. Thank god i live 7 mins from work. But then of course i see my horrible neighbor whose kids kicks my car and is an all around delinquent. So i try and be polite and smile while i am rushing to my car that is parked right in from of her house. I am so exhausted yet refreshed. Coffeeeeeeee