batman smells like beef and cheese

Okay so my day started out all “Yay, rainy day!” But it has slowly turned on me. I am bored out of my skull. This is not an abnormal thing. But I have started doing stream of conscience writing to make myself look busy. This tends to get me in trouble with my own brain. So I am writing away and I starting thinking about how much more awesome life would have been if I had just played by the rules. Ya know, took an internship with a photographer like I was supposed to instead of working 2 jobs to pay for my so-called friends alcohol consumption. Then I was like maybe I need to get farther away than just Philly. Maybe we should move to London. It looks like the housing prices our similar and the job market might actually be a better one! Then I think that god is punishing me because my contact falls out and I am stuck sitting here with one contact in and a splitting headache. Ugh, I had to call matty face and tell him to bring me my glasses so that I can drive home safely. I can’t get the stinking contact back in.

Let’s just say thank goodness it is Friday. I have seriously nothing planned, but I think I might have to our save the dates since Matt cannot be trusted with a single wedding task. What part of our deadline is Sept 13 for save the dates does he not understand. And when I ask why he hasn’t done them he simply says he doesn’t have the time. He doesn’t have the time he is sitting on the couch zooming out while petting Toulouse. That looks like at least 10 min of free time to me.

I understand he doesn’t spend time with the pups as much as I do, but he doesn’t seem to want to spend the kind of time they want. They want to play and give kisses. Matt wants them to sit there and be petted. He wants a breathing pillow to lie next to him. I see them as babies. Babies who need me to feed them and love them. I would never let anyone hurt them. Not that I think Matt would ever let anyone hurt them either, but I think that Matt is so used to having dogs that are seen as pets only he doesn’t feel the same maternal instinct I do. I realize I constantly put myself in crazy dog lady category, but hey I’m a crazy punk rock dog momma now give me a few years and I will be crazy punk rock mom.

Now don’t get me started on mommy-dom. I can’t wait to be a mommy. I think about it all the time, but I feel as though I missed so much of my life already rushing through the boring bits that I don’t want to rush into that as well. My entire life has been spent waiting for the next phase. For the first time in my life I am trying to actually enjoy a stage. The newly wedded bliss people talk about. I can’t wait. We will “have a house” and can enjoy each other!!! Hah, I seriously fool myself when I say that we will have any free time to enjoy each other. We have zero free time now. There is always somewhere we need to be or something that needs to be done. There are never enough days in the week.

I just made the mistake of looking at the clock. 3 o’clock and still nothing to do. I think pretending to write emails is starting to glean a small amount of suspicion from the peanut gallery. Going to hide in plain sight.